Home Standards of Black Beauty Black Women, Our Bodies & Perceptions of Beauty: The Booty

Black Women, Our Bodies & Perceptions of Beauty: The Booty

by Erika Nicole Kendall

No more prevalent, in the lonnnng list of reasons why women like me don’t work out, is the excuse of the booty.

As much as I love her... she's doing exactly what I'm talking about - hiding her front (in a robe, no less) but accentuating her back? Why not work on both? Good grief.

I’m serious. In fact, the only post on this entire site full of excuses, explanations, “b-b-buts,” disbelief and complaints is the one post I did about building a fit booty. Women who don’t believe that it is possible to build a booty (why? because they haven’t been able to do it yet, of course) complaining and questioning me, all because I question the desire to cling to an unhealthy lifestyle all for the sake of holding onto a re-buildable feature.

When women talk to me about how they don’t want to work out because they don’t want to burn the booty, I often – in my head – question if they notice the other things that come with that choice. For example, the huge thighs attached to the fat booty. The spare tire that nests directly above it. The gut we’re constantly trying to hide with long, cute, flowy shirts. The saddlebags that come from thigh fat being pushed aside for our gut sitting on our laps. And somewhere, someone is wondering what the hell saddlebags are.

I think of the women often named to me in regards to having large booty, and it’s almost always a video chick. Why? Because that’s what they hear the men (or women?) near them desiring, and since they want to be desired too, this is what they covet. I giggle a little bit when I google them or when I reference the pictures they’ve shown me. There’s usually a chick in a bikini, typically photoshopped [poorly], with her booty turned flush to the camera. The first thing in my mind is “Okay, so what does she look like in motion?” Then, I hit youtube. I can usually see what they look like without the interference of photoshop. There’s usually something out of wack that cannot be hidden by creative photoshopping, clever positioning of arms and legs, or “interesting” costuming… but we’re willing to overlook that in our desire to glorify her booty.

So… let’s look at what we’re working with, here. Girls who make money off of their bodies being in tip top shape are being idolized by women who don’t want to work out… because they think that not working out will help them develop or maintain the same figure. There’s no logic in that. None.

There’s also always the occasional mention of the around-the-way-girl-with-the-giant-booty. The girl who has a phenomenal figure complete with a giant behind, and everyone – including her – knows it. This girl is usually shaping the hell out of her behind and thighs with the same brand of jeans every day, and telling everyone she was “just born this way.” I’ll tell you from personal experience – these girls are, more often than not, lying. There’s always something about being told you have an admirable feature, and being able to say “Oh, I was born with that!” with a sly smile tacked on the end.. knowing full well you’re enjoying fooling people.

It’s bull. Be it straight up exercise, dance, yoga positions – or, hell, sex positions – something is helping assist in the shape of that body. It can be hormones and genetics, but more often than not? You’re being hoodwinked… or snookered.

The amount of stock we put in this is crazy to me. I’ll even fire a few shots – some of the booties that I’ve seen women claim to want to protect… could use a lot of work. No one seems to notice that the booties belonging to these video and magazine girls don’t have creases… or dimples… or clumps of fat. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not trying to denigrate anyone, here. I’m trying to understand why we would cling to a misconception of what a “great booty” truly is, to use as an excuse to not put in work. Three particular things can actually enhance the booty we all have: 1) decreasing the “spare tire effect” around the tummy actually increases the slope from the back to the booty; 2) decreasing the thigh fat increases the curve in the booty; 3) squatting, lunching and hopping for your life actually picks up your cheeks. But for some reason, we’d rather believe that proper booty shaping comes from being cornfed and allergic to the gym. I mean, I could assume that it’s simply because we don’t want to put in work… but that’s nothing new.

I’d ask the question of why the booty is so powerful among women that we’d risk our health to preserve it.. but I believe I’ve already answered it. “Because that’s what they hear the men (or women?) near them desiring, and since they want to be desired too, this is what they covet.” I’ve already shared my thoughts on this foolishness.

The reality is this. We all know how prevalent this thinking is in our community. And much like the mentality that you have to adopt to be anti-processed foods and pro-clean eating… you have to be equally strong-willed in your rejection of this booty talk. Have faith in the fact that you can build the booty you want along with the completely fit and sexy body you desire… and develop better health all along the way. That’s what I call a total win. 🙂

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Lish July 27, 2010 - 8:52 AM

This article was amusing but at the same time so very true!

Erika July 28, 2010 - 9:45 AM

Thanks! 🙂

tequila April 28, 2013 - 11:32 AM


There are some women who are blessed with a nice figure. My niece is one of them and she takes after me. After having kids I gained weight but I have maintained my shape. The important thing is to know you are beautiful regardless of how you are built and accept what God has given you.

Ms.KiA July 27, 2010 - 9:12 AM

I have never known a man to meet, fall in love with and marry a woman just because she’s got booty because if that same woman is crazy as hell, he’s out the door. No questions, and no convincing him to stay. Losing weight and getting healthy requires more than just eating and exercising… as you always write about… it takes a lot of mental refocusing. You’re doing a great job “here”. Keep up the good work.

Erika July 28, 2010 - 9:46 AM

Goes to show you just how much priority we place n the wrong things, right? 🙂

D. Mack July 27, 2010 - 9:26 AM

How do I get rid of the spare tire? It has plagued me my whole life.

Erika July 28, 2010 - 9:47 AM

Cardio, baby! You can’t pick and choose where the body burns fat, so just do cardiovascular activity and fat will begin to burn from everywhere… including your spare tire!

And get your water in, too. 🙂

Starr July 27, 2010 - 9:48 AM

Hi Erika,
I know you’re not there yet, but can you speak on fitness after 50. At this age many men and women say, whatever. If you are relatively healthy and haven’t had a serious illness or injury that prevents you from working out regularly, you should. After a ten year break I started working out this past May with a personal trainer in a boot camp atmosphere. I have stuck with it and it is paying off. This big booty and these thunder thighs are taking on a new shape and I like it. I read your blog religiously, you are an inspiration. Keep up the good work. Love ya! Starr

Erika July 28, 2010 - 9:48 AM

What aspect of fitness after 50 would you like covered? I know people like to marginalize our 50s-folks with a ton of gloom and doom talk, but there are plenty of us who not only look forward to our 50s (I know I do – I’ll have grown folks money with a 21 year old’s body? I’m game.) but there are those of us in our 50s who are truly enjoying life to the fullest living healthily or working to get there. You tell me what aspect of fit after 50 you want to know about, and I’m all yours. 🙂

Janine September 12, 2013 - 10:37 AM

Did you ever end up writing this post? I am curious to read what you have to say!

Erika Nicole Kendall September 13, 2013 - 12:36 PM

Hmm, which aspect are you curious about? Maybe I’ll write it just for you. 🙂

EL DARKO KNIGHTO July 27, 2010 - 9:56 AM

I’m not one of you ladies. I’m a dude. However, i’ve discussed the behavior over and over again. You used a great word “costuming.” I often see it as a “deflection” or “detour” though. The large lady with the robust breast wearing a low-cut/tight shirt. Or that same lady wearing the newest clothes (especially tight pants), hair done, nails tight, etc. They take the attention away from what’s really going on. I blame a “pin pointing society” for this (Ass-man, Breast-Man, Leg-man,..) like cats are picking out chicken parts at a restaurant. It’s senseless. Worry about the whole body. Who complains about a WHOLE TIGHT BODY?

Erika July 28, 2010 - 9:51 AM


I don’t know.. I mean, I think it depends on the person. I’m not gonna throw shade at someone who is just well kept… but I WILL throw shade at you if I’ve heard you say that you don’t want to lose weight JUST BECAUSE of your booty, but you’re actively ignoring/covering up/hiding the “problem areas” and reasons why you SHOULD work out.

Lots of people complain about whole “tight” bodies. They “need sandwiches.” I think that’s also referred to as “hating,” though. LOL

Jessica February 3, 2011 - 2:53 PM

I dunno. I did p90x and insanity and while I’ve gotten a lot of compliments about my weight lost, I’ve gotten a lot of complaints about it too.

By the way… there is nothing wrong with big thighs. I’m in shape now but I would cry if my thighs were gone. Its like my trademark…

Erika February 3, 2011 - 3:05 PM

There’s nothing wrong with SHAPELY thighs. Big? Ehh… just make sure there’s muscle in there. LOL

EL DARKO KNIGHTO July 27, 2010 - 9:57 AM

and how do I lose the chick as my avatar?

Erika July 27, 2010 - 10:05 AM

LOL Go to gravatar.com!

Brie July 27, 2010 - 10:12 AM


Thank you for this post! As a former hour glass who is looking more like a 2-liter these days but working on getting back to my hourglass shape, I can attest that the attitudes I get about losing weight are ridiculous!!

My butt is big proportionally no matter what I do it will still always be big, but every guy I have dated during my weight loss journey will always say “make sure you don’t lose your booty” as well as some girlfriends who feel inadequate because they aren’t born with the booty that i have. WTH?!?

i love my body but i could stand to lose the dimples and excess fat especially since I plan to squat and lunge my way into as you say a “fit booty” id rather see a smoother, smaller booty with a phat shape then a big, saggy, dimply one with what some still think is a phat shape.

as i continue to work out i can see the changes in my booty as well as the saddlebags get smaller and i love it!

when i was young i was athletic and didnt have all of this excess foolishness and and my butt was PHAT. and that is who i want to be healthy, fit and okay with how i look in the mirror. that should be more important than how big my booty is.

Erika July 28, 2010 - 9:53 AM

Right! I don’t think many men understand the difference between quality and quantity… you can have a LOT of booty, but um… is the quality all there? And for the sake of one’s ego, they might respond “YES I HAVE A QUALITY BOOTY!!!111!1!1” but the reality might not be the same, lol.

“that is who i want to be healthy, fit and okay with how i look in the mirror. that should be more important than how big my booty is.”

Yes. 🙂

A Man July 27, 2010 - 10:56 AM

Is it really a matter of what men want or request? Really? Why is it that this subject (health) we men get a pass and your attention? We don’t influence your job decisions. We don’t influence how you spend your money at your favorite stores. We don’t control strong black women with our desires except for when it comes to health reasons. It’s another excuse to let go IMO. It doesn’t help when we drool over big booties, but you all are smarter than that.

Erika July 28, 2010 - 9:55 AM

You’re grossly underestimating the amount of things women do for male attention.

I don’t think this is about “strong” Black women – its not about strength. It’s about being tunnel visioned… and because the current meme is that “Black men are an endangered species… acquire one at all costs!!11!!!1!1” women can and often DO allow men to influence those things.

Is it an excuse? YES. Is it a conscious one? I don’t think so. Not so much, lol.

Kat's Meow April 17, 2012 - 10:27 PM

You are seriously underestimating the prevalence of male influence, period. Heteronormative patriarchy. Look it up.

Janine October 15, 2012 - 8:10 PM

Sing ittttt

Ladi Ohm July 27, 2010 - 11:27 AM

I’m not worried about my booty… squats, lunges, yoga, and walking on a super high incline on the treadmill have taken care of that, very nicely, if I might add ;)… but, I am in mourning over the loss of my boobs 🙁

Erika July 28, 2010 - 9:55 AM

Me too, girl, me too. *sigh* LOL!

Durkia November 27, 2012 - 4:27 PM

Pssshhh you guys can have some of mine. My booty and thighs are toned but I am having a hard time losing my breast. They are so disproportionate to the rest of my body. Any suggestions?!?!

Erika Nicole Kendall November 27, 2012 - 6:22 PM
victoria July 27, 2010 - 5:01 PM

hi not to be harsh and speaking from a big girl prospective no one is going to look at ur booty or boobs in a casket. and think of it this way you will be able to get cheaper panties and bras and also can wear a bikinin without someone doing the screw face.
loool with that being said can you tell are there any good cereals out there if any any can you talk about vitamins or herbal cleansers thanks love ya mean you always help me.

Erika July 31, 2010 - 1:43 PM

It is harsh, but for some of us it’s a definite truth. We just have to prioritize… and surely, our health can come before a rebuildable curve in our frame, right? 🙂

And no, I’m not going to help you out with any herbal cleansers! Get some fiber in your diet! 🙂

true2me July 28, 2010 - 12:01 PM

I love this post the most because I suffered from poor eating and unhealthy lifestyle gaining 20 lbs cause it gave me booty (pancake was my nickname. lol). But I have high cholesterol, and will never have the booty that is coveted in music videos. Back to healthy eating I go and NOT trying to be like someone else. Working on being healthy and loving me as I WAS MEANT TO BE :-), slim w a tight booty

Erika July 31, 2010 - 1:45 PM

Shoutout to those nicknames we ALL could do without, LOL.

See, I’m anti-video-girl-booty. If her donk isn’t a fit one – and I can usually tell from how it moves – then I’m usually turned off by it. (Not like I’m turned on by it, but I’m sayin’ LOL) If I’m going to covet something, let it be something that I can obtain on my quest to be healthier and fit for me! I’m loving your mentality on this! 🙂

A MAN July 28, 2010 - 4:18 PM

But Erika it issssss conscious if women a speaking out loud of these things as a goal. I want to give you ladies more credit.

Erika July 31, 2010 - 1:46 PM

It’s not about giving us more credit, but it IS about recognizing that a lot of what we do (both men AND women) has to do with the opposite sex. I think Jay-Z said it best – “The power of the p….” #justsayin

Dava July 31, 2010 - 1:34 PM

Wow…THANK YOU! I really needed to hear this. My journey to getting back into shape and to regaining my health has been a long time coming and, even though I work out anyway, I was really worried about losing my “lady lumps” LOL! My journey had to begin mentally and emotionally, once I started to take care of that, taking better care of my body came naturally, because the whole package needs to fit together! I am still learning how to take better care of my body, and the humor and truth in both the post and the comments is just invaluable! Thank you SO much!

Erika July 31, 2010 - 1:48 PM

No… thank YOU!

I mean, we’re serious about this, but you have to admit that it’s a little giggle-worthy that a BOOTY can be so powerful, man. LOLOL

Tamara October 17, 2010 - 11:34 AM

Great article!

me October 17, 2010 - 12:26 PM

I like my butt. Its ok now that I am a big girl. But when I started losing weigh, my thighs and legs tone up, my butt gets high and round.perfect. Like the letter c. I dislike squats, lunges, and lots of cardio, but vanity is keeping me at the gym (and healthier!). And Erika I’ve been following your blog, and I have to agree that rating clean(er) is making me drop 4 to 5 pounds a week!

Maisha November 12, 2010 - 4:55 PM

I absolutely LOVED this post! As a personal trainer AND someone who works at a weight loss center I have seen too many Black women come in who don’t take their health seriously. They want to lose 20 lbs when they clearly need to lose 60 or more. And where do they want to lose it? Their gut. It’s time for Black women to take our health (mental and physical) seriously. Men will find us attractive if we feel attractive. Big booties are NOT a necessity LOL.

Lyn December 20, 2010 - 1:29 PM

Um yeah. I guess I am lucky because I had a booty from day one. When I was ‘thin’ and dancing full time I still had the booty. Got voted ‘the most fun to walk behind’ in college. ( a little humiliating ) When I gained weight of course the but got bigger, but to me it isn’t the size its the quality. I want to lose the weight and get the quality shape and firmness back where it goes. I love my butt, and often say it has magical powers. LOL! However I have to admit the focus on it in the black community can be very daunting. To see men making a bee line for you ONLY AFTER they have seen your behind gets to be annoying. They are talking to you and its like a ticker on their foreheads “Im only wanting to touch the booooootttteeeeeeeee” I have had women angry at me because of it, I have had to fight men physically because of it.

emma January 20, 2011 - 11:14 PM

oh yes! late to the party, but i hear that alllll the time! I have always been slim, but very fitness oriented and i had some body image issues because i didn’t have a “black” body. but now i realize that thin women can have curves, just more like ) ( instead of ( ) lol

DESIREE WILLIAMS June 21, 2011 - 9:43 AM

I totally agree with your article, I want to get my body in the best shape possible, but I have to tell you that my butt is a problem, it’s the first thing guys notice,and the ONLY thing. I absolutely hate it. I mean, I don’t want to lose it totally, but, I want to get it smaller than it is. I am just tired of people telling me that “oh no matter how much exercise you do, it ain’t going nowhere!” SO if I lost 150 pounds, my butt will still be the same size that it is now, “I don’t think so!!” anyway, I have been following your whole website closely, and it has given me more hope than I have had in a long time. THANKS!!

Cmoni July 5, 2011 - 6:01 PM

Love the article. Not exercising because you don’t want to lose your booty is ridic! Sadly enough black communities give into the hype and put waaaay too much emphasis on the coveted “booty”. Who says all black women have big booties anyway ??? We come in all shapes and sizes. We need to worry about our health and self worth first. I am 6ft and athletic but have never had a huge donk (lol), I USE to be very self conscious about it but fortunately I have grown to love what I have. Lastly ladies ditch those clowns that are only interested in the “booty.” Better yet ask them if their man part is over a certain size, laugh @ them then walk away when it doesn’t match up, that will teach the idiot a lesson.

Yaasha July 7, 2011 - 4:53 PM

I’m gonna go ahead and echo a lot of what’s being said in here already. I have definitely dated guys who have told me that they prefer me heavier and that if I start to work out “don’t lose your booty.” However, my mother often says that one of the first things she noticed about me when I was born was my butt, and she automatically wondered “What on earth am I going to do about this child?” All that aside, since I began to experience issues with my weight from the age of 19, I fell into being in denial about my weight by feeding into all the compliments/comments I received about my backside, and before I knew it, 130 lbs became 155, and 155 became 185 by the time I was 26. Damn near 60 pounds over a little over 6 years is ridiculous, y’all. I am also a lifelong vegetarian, and it is mega easy to fall into the trap of convincing yourself that you eat healthily just because you’re not eating dead animal carcass. I think that it’s more important to pay attention to how your clothes fit and look at the numbers on the measuring tape than it is to look at the scale because an increase/decrease in your inches can tell you a lot about how you gain and lose weight, as well as how your weight distributes itself. For example, if you want to do a workout plan and you have concerns about losing your backside disproportionately to your waistline, then you can do exercises that lift your glutes and that target your midsection and monitor your progress through measurement.

I have to say, Ericka, that your blog in general has been a big source of inspiration for me and I’ve been following it religiously for the past 2 months. Just making a few tweaks to my eating habits i.e. more green veggies, balancing carbs and proteins, cutting down on dairy has helped me immensely, and now that I’m incorporating more exercise into my routine aside from the work that I do as a dance instructor, I am really enjoying my journey into a healthier body. I think that I could probably use a little more guidance in the diet department and am seriously considering your vegetarian meal plan. Thanks for doing what you do so well!

Stefanie September 13, 2011 - 5:43 PM

The saddlebags that come from thigh fat being pushed aside for our gut sitting on our laps.”

Ooh such a horrid visual, (laughs)…makes me want to go run NOW!

Okay, back to reading the rest of the story….

ro September 18, 2011 - 11:30 AM

I use to have an event happening behind me. Then I lost weight and saw the stretch marks that had been resting on top of my ‘booty’ now go a third of the way up my back. Its a shame what I had been calling my black womans booty was just a poorly mishapened body. Gone is the cottage cheese, currently enjoying the mozerrela and looking forward to a hard french cheese (firm baby). It must be jam cus jelly don’t shake like that is truly a myth.

Valarie October 6, 2011 - 12:09 PM

I have never fallen into the “don’t lose the booty” mentality. I was raised in a white home that didn’t glorify booty, and it mostly made me feel like I was too fat. In fact, I tried hard for many, many years to reduce my rear to a more caucasion shape, becoming borderline anorexic in the process. It was when I saw my hip bones starting to stick out, I realized that I had a booty because that was the shape of my pelvis, and there was no getting rid of it. Now that I have a much healthier lifestyle I mostly work on keeping those muscles toned and lifted instead. Running up hills seems to be a great way to get both cardio and toned glutes.

Lorraine October 7, 2011 - 1:31 AM

I’m really fascinated by the concept that people refuse to exercise for fear of losing the booty. As someone with the supposedly mythical small waist, big booty, flat stomach combo (which, by the way, is an incredibly common body type in Rwanda-where half my genes come from- and other parts of Central Africa), I can assure you that if you are genetically blessed/cursed with a big butt, it is probably not going anywhere just because you exercise. Trust me, I’ve tried to get rid of it. In fact, part of my journey toward a healthy body image is accepting that my butt is not gross tumour on an otherwise fit and lean body.

This conversation is really important for black women because I have heard so many strange things about my body to the tune of “don’t lose that, it’s your best asset (no pun intended)” combined with constant assaults on my psyche by the likes of King Magazine and various other publications, that I have spent much of the past 16 years wishing I had an “easier” body type (one without curves). I felt people would stop feeling an obligation to comment on what is not theirs. Of course I know that every body type is subject to commentary in a patriarchal world such as ours, but I never really understood the deep desire to have a booty until recently when my very good friend who is top heavy and narrow at the bottom explained some of what she goes through with men, women, and magazines commenting on her shape.

I don’t think reshaping our bodies to fit some impossible ideal of a black woman is the way to go. I think being strong so we can drop kick the next fool who gives unsolicited advice on our body shapes is a good (good is relative, right?) alternative. 😉

Keep up the good work!

TiToA October 25, 2011 - 7:08 PM

I always heard women say “you don’t want to be an ironing board”…

I grew up actually wanting to get rid of my rear and be flat in rebellion because I was so sick of Black women telling me to be “proud” of my thighs and my rear when I knew that I was overweight.

Ashley January 9, 2012 - 12:44 PM

Hi Erika,

I think your article is right. I’m not considered overweight or anything, but I’m really out of shape. People always assume that I’m not just because of my size. Things are not as firm as they seem. I don’t know where to start because I have an unhealthy diet, but I have to eat from a meal plan at school. I would like to get rid of my little pouchy stomach and tighten up my thighs and booty.

Allison January 10, 2012 - 3:05 PM

My boyfriend told me that I should not begin a workout regimen because he loved my booty, and I am ashamed to admit that I postponed my healthy lifestyle indefinitely because I wanted his admiration. I will now go home and hit him in the head with a frying pan before I hit the gym!

I was born that way but I went too far January 21, 2012 - 12:23 AM

I kinda disagree with this one in one way….I was born that way! For real! In my hayday, my waist was super small, board flat stomach with abs, toned arms and thighs, I was sometimes even skinny but I did work out…just a kid who like to play …but my derriere was huge and it was the bain of my existence! It was too much attention and I didn’t like it. I was the girl with the sweater tied around my waist trying to hide it, only to have men (all races) joke and flirt about how I can’t hid that with a sweater! Embarrassing because I was never the “I want to marry her” flat bootied girl, I was the “I want to take her home tonight…she looks like she would be a lot of “fun” girl and I hated it. I wanted to be cherished, not objectified but my figure always had me being objectified and the target of perverts including parents friends, clergy (yes, clergy), women, teachers and even a doctor. People wanting to randomly grab it like I’m some side show. Remember the story of Saarjite Bartman? No cute guy in our society wants to take a girl who looks like that home to momma, probably because momma knew his intentions probably wouldn’t be good and he might get hemmed up with an unwanted pregnancy. It was not in any way a feature I liked and I remember purposefully walking in a way that sort of tucked my behind in to minimize it’s size.

I am sooo sorry but I can’t agree with this article AT ALL. Some of us were born tiny with big behinds. I wouldn’t be surprised if I emotionally ate to take away some of that attention. It is only when I got to being 100+lbs overweight in later in life that I began to see the stomach, still a big behind but shapely thing. And I didn’t like that either. I’m 40lbs down now and counting. I may not get back to that buck-25 time of my life but I’ll take a dollar and a quarter over this right now. Seriously

I was born that way but I went too far January 21, 2012 - 12:29 AM

I should add, I agree with everything else. I tease my boyfriend that by the time I’m done with me, there will be at least a 40% reduction in the booty. This makes him sad. I don’t care. 🙂

lola January 21, 2012 - 4:06 PM

I have a natural big but with a slim body. I hate it. I’m considering lipo to get rid of it. I never ear jeans. I don’t ant to be the stereotypical black girl, having people treating me bad because of it.

Desiree March 6, 2012 - 2:40 PM

*raises hand meekly* And what exactly are “saddlebags”?……….

Andrea April 5, 2012 - 1:01 PM

I used to think this way, which is pretty sad as someone who works in healthcare. At any rate, I’ve being going to the gym and doing aerobics classes, the booty has been taken to a new level=more defined, firm-less wobbly, and personally I like it. More than my booty lift, is the overall good feeling, that you get from working out-clarity of mind, a great way to de-stress and being around positive people.

alicia April 5, 2012 - 5:40 PM

loved it. I work out and Im actually trying to build that perfect butt

Violets Mommy April 24, 2012 - 4:53 PM

I loved this article. I don’t have booty envy I wish I could give some of mine away. Its round and tight for the most part, walking helps but I want to make it smaller. I love squats!! My mother, grandmother, and 3 sisters all have no butts so I wonder where the heck this came from. My mother always jokes that I must have a bustle on , which is embarrassing to no end. I have been praised and insulted, having people comment and actually make fun of me. Around here there are alot of big butts but mostly misshapen ed, boxy, with tsunami thighs, and guts. Jammed into clothes many sizes too small. Yucky. I don’t think its normal to have a 65 inch waist. Is it me? and keeping excess weight to attract men or keep them, no good sorry. I belong to a gym to I can defy aging and at 45 or so look pretty damn good, and would rather lose my booty. So if someone wants some of mine……

Naija May 21, 2012 - 2:04 PM

*church tambourine* This post was everything! I know its much easier to say, “Men like big booties, I have a big booty, therefore I am fine the way I am”, vs coming to terms that simply possessing a sought after trait isn’t enough.

Although I started my weight loss journey with no fear of ‘loosing my booty’ (because my genes have made it clear that it isn’t going anywhere), I do appreciate the emphasis put on making sure that big booty is fit & functional. 🙂 Although I’m seriously trying to see if I can get it higher, lol. Its become a personal goal at this point.

To that end, I’ve also made good friends with the lunge, and jump squat and I can say I’ve been the happiest due to it, lol. My thighs aren’t trying to join the party though. We gon pray on that though. :p

ImJustSayn September 27, 2012 - 1:16 PM

I personally look forward to the day when this BIG BOOTY of mines goes down……..ALOT! I don’t care what SOME men may think or love about a ridiculous fat azz on these womens back, I mean I have seen some outrageous behinds with the bogus added bonus of guts and jiggly thighs to follow, and I wonder how can she look in the mirror and think that is attractive and healthy? It’s a mess and like I said I am looking forward to the day when this butt goes down, trim, fit and healthy!

Dominique October 21, 2012 - 3:58 PM

“Three particular things can actually enhance the booty we all have: 1) decreasing the “spare tire effect” around the tummy actually increases the slope from the back to the booty; 2) decreasing the thigh fat increases the curve in the booty; 3) squatting, lunging and hopping for your life actually picks up your cheeks.”

Yes ma’am! When I was younger I lost weight but didn’t start toning and I lost the butt I had (I used to be more hips anyway). When I started gaining weight again, the first 20ish pounds went to my butt. When I decided to start working out again, I made a point to start weight training from the start.

My body is proof of the quote above! I’ve lost 3 inches off my hips and butt (46 to a 43 inch) BUT my butt looks bigger now than it did at 46″.
1) My waist is smaller in the front AND my lower back is much slimmer. My back to butt slope is way bigger than it ever was before. Even at my smallest.

2) My thighs are still thick but there is a more noticeable difference between them and my butt!

3) My booty is sitting much higher now than it was 3 inches (and 24 pounds ago).

Most of my favorite video girls are also heavy into fitness, I think that helped me get a better idea of what I did “wrong” before. Weight training for “THAT BOOTY” will have you in the mirror swooning over yourself like YASSSSSSSSS!

I may have gotten the “meat” of this booty from genetics and eating but weight training is what’s giving me the, “YES LAWD!” factor 🙂

Gloria October 21, 2012 - 7:07 PM

This is my first time tuning in, good topic, I use to have a nice round basketball booty dont know what happened, I’ve always been active with some type of exercise with weight toning included, Im now now 39 i do zumba, & West African dance, I just want to stay fit but every guy ive dated have been “booty” men, a lil gut dont matter to them or strecth marks & dimples, they see the booty and their minds are gone. Would like more info on re-shaping my booty…Thanks

Erika Nicole Kendall October 23, 2012 - 7:14 AM
Shaunte November 29, 2012 - 1:36 PM

I love this article..I am currently on the journey to a healthier me..I have booty for days and have also heard some of the ridiculous comments that have been previously stated…what I’ve learned is that I have to been comfortable in my own skin…if that meand losing some of this booty and these thunder thighs so be it..being healthy is waaaaay more important!

Shaunte November 29, 2012 - 1:39 PM

Ooops have to be comfortable in my own skin..and means instead of meand…

guest August 29, 2013 - 1:19 PM

I was 9 lb at birth. I’ve always been on some kinda new plan. I try to lose weight It’s been hard. I want to keep my nails and hair together and wear flowy shirts because that’s what I feel looks best on me. I’m not trying to wear a costume I just want to be as attractive as possible right now. Some of my friends don’t workout they have a awesome body. I’m not that girl I’m the girl who has been working out all her life and someone says oh did u just start working out. Genes has a lot to do with it!

Jeanette September 1, 2013 - 8:04 PM

Okay cardio will burn fat in areas you want to burn fat and you say drink lots of water, well tell me how to burn fat with cardio minus the water? I’m a dialysis person and I cant drink water like many people I get 32 ozs a day that’s it so tell me, will I get the same affects without the all that water?

Erika Nicole Kendall September 1, 2013 - 11:11 PM

Doing a ton of cardio without the ability to drink water just sounds like you’re asking for dehydration. I wouldn’t even do it. If I were, you, I would focus on my eating. That will facilitate plenty of weight loss, coupled with very slow and steady state cardio, IMO.

Jeanette September 1, 2013 - 11:36 PM

Thanks for your reply Erica its rough for us that do dialysis but where there is a will there is a way! We too want to still look good. Watching what I eat and staying away from processed foods and measuring what I eat is the key for me to losing weight and but toning is an issue. I will do some cardio but keep light so I don’t dehydrate myself. Love your blog Erica.

Erika Nicole Kendall September 1, 2013 - 11:43 PM

If toning is an issue, then I’d go with low-intensity cardio, and a consistent lifting routine.

Jacinda November 19, 2014 - 11:34 AM

I never had much of a round shape booty to care about keeping it so that was never my concern but I always had nice sized boobs and giving that up is going to be hard but at the same time I can always go to Victoria Secret lol, the most important thing though is being healthy.

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