Site icon A Black Girl's Guide To Weight Loss

The Kickstarter That Wants You To Fund Fat-Shaming

Y’all know me.

I don’t pull any punches.

This woman’s an id–let me be nice:

Its undeniable that when we stand a skinny, athletic or even average sized female next to a larger (even if less healthy, overweight or obese) female, that unless we live outside of this stigma, we as Americans will assume that the heavier person is funnier, smarter, nicer, and less sexually promiscuous, all because she is not as thin or physically fit than the girl next to her.

“I’m sorry the butt I work for isn’t as good as the one you ate for,” because apparently the average cheeto booty is better than a fit booty? I just… what is this supposed to mean? Don’t get on the Internet trying to slander if you can’t even get your slander straight.

The premise of the book is not to bash or assault any single body type, quite the opposite. I want to share the stories of women who have dealt with this discriminatory action.

Why should a woman have to apologize for wanting to be fit?
Why should a woman have to apologize because she likes to run? or eat healthy? or just has the metabolism that is geared to keep weight at bay?

There are millions of women out there and im sure you know at least one looking for a voice , not from tvs and magazines, not from victorias secret.. but from the ground level , to speak up and tell them that its okay to want to be in better shape.

It doesn’t make you stupid or shallow or un-motherly or bad person to want to take care of your body.

No, my dear, it certainly doesn’t make you stupid, shallow, or selfish (un-motherly?) to want to be fit.

It does, in fact, make you an asshole when you have to make this proclamation by making statements like the following:

Collection of images of women standing up against a society that protects fat culture while bastardizing thin and athletic women.

In what culture are thin and athletic women bastardized?

Am I missing something?

Like, America, right?

It’s one thing to say that society tries to erase the womanliness or “femininity” of any woman who chooses to lift weights instead of merely satisfying their desire to see women in the cardio section, only. I mean, really, “thin” and “athletic” are two wholly different creatures, and while “thin” always gets its praise, “athletic” has caveats, and if you cross the wrong fine line, you’re “a man.” You “can’t have a six-pack” because those are for men. You can’t have finely chiseled arms, because those are for men. (Clearly, I’m projecting, right now.)

It’s one thing to say that society demeans thin women by barking at them how they’re in dire need of a sandwich. It’s a third thing to complain that accommodations like vanity sizing make it hard for people who want to be in shape to actually stay in shape.

Hell, I’ll even double down – it’s a fourth thing to say that society sends mixed messages to women about their bodies – be supermodel thin, but not even the supermodel-thin supermodels are allowed to freely admit what they do to say so thin. How many Esquire and GQ mag articles with thin actresses and models include some anecdote about the subject sitting with the writer, scarfing down a triple cheeseburger?

It is another thing, entirely, to feel like you need to prop yourself at the expense of other women… or, hell, people in general.

If you think this country, who shames fat people and believes they are undateable, unmateable, unworthy of acknowledgement or humanity, incapable of doing their jobs, unworthy of employment (or advancement in their own current place of employment… y’know, where people can watch them every day and see how capable they are), unintelligent, incapable of caring for themselves (why else would you be so fat?), incapable of self-love, unworthy of self-esteem (how dare a fat chick be proud of herself? she’s fat!!!111ONE), and only deserving of the most cruel and most harshest treatment, only to be praised if and only if they’re losing the weight…

…if you think this country, after all that, is celebrating obesity and propping the overweight population upon a pedestal… I need to come kick it where you live, and grab a bag of chips, girl.

Now, before you tell me how I’m overreacting, and how Delizia actually has a point… let’s be clear. I see my fair share of size-shaming all over the place. “No man wants a bone… bones are for dogs” or however that foolishness goes… that’s something even I’ve started hearing as people hear where I’m going and what I’m doing. “Oh, you’re trying to look like those white girls. You think you bad or something, huh?”

Sigh.

Believe it or not, that’s really not about “glorifying obesity.” It’s the exact same thing she’s doing… it’s just coming from the other side of the spectrum. And, instead of fighting against size-shaming and society’s pre-occupation with finding it acceptable to tell women what their bodies should look/feel like, she’d rather practice a creepy form of one-upmanship. On someone else’s dime. And then charge $50 “un-personalized” (fifty!!!!!) retail for it. Chile… if I have a hard time paying Thomas Keller $50, I’m certainly not paying for fat-shaming.

From her profile:

As a mom , it just terrifies me that there are little girls out there, who, instead of being told they can look like a disney princess AND be smart, and well educated , they are told that its either or.

No child should be taught that being healthy , or active, or pretty , means your dirty, or dumb.

Delizia, who is not the woman in the picture above, who also wrote a blog post on what appears to be her blog about how fat and ugly strippers are the reason why the pretty/classy strippers are breaking the “no sex in the champagne room” rule, could’ve turned this into an epic opportunity to crowdsource a “stop judging women’s bodies” campaign. She didn’t. And now, I haz a sad. A big one. Because even though she has a point – no woman should be told they can only choose between being pretty and being smart, and being pretty doesn’t mean you’re dirty, loose, or un-smart – she’s attacking it the wrong way… and getting publicity for it. The answer isn’t to say “No, BEING THIN IS OKAY! ITS THE FATTIES THAT ARE THE PROBLEM!” The answer is “stop judging women’s bodies!”

All I can say, is that I hope, as her Kickstarter progresses, that she truly re-thinks her approach. But, if not, I just hope it crashes into a fiery uninhabited island, Lost-style.

That’s all I got.

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