So… I happen across these photos on Gawker of 50 Cent

…accompanied with the following short story:

It takes several long stares to comprehend that these photos depict rapper 50 Cent, who once looked like this. In the name of his burgeoning acting career, he removed several tattoos and lost 60 lbs. to play a cancer patient.

…50 Cent can expect breathless accolades for his portrayal of a cancer patient in next year’s Things Fall Apart. These photos come from 50 Cent’s official fan site, where a moderator explains,

He dropped from 214 pounds to an astonishing 160 with a liquid diet and three-hour-a-day treadmill walks for nine weeks.

“I was starving.” Now he’s back on tour and says, “I’ve been eating. I’ll be back in shape in no time!”

I didn’t expect anyone to really ask me what I thought about it, but hey. This is a site about weight loss, huh?

Y’know, 50 Cent isn’t the first to go to drastic measures to fulfill the obligations of a role. I can think of celebrities gaining weight (Robert DeNiro in Raging Bull, Jennifer Hudson with Dreamgirls), losing weight (Tom Hanks in Cast Away, Jennifer Hudson… again, supposedly)… and working darn hard to get the rubber band to go back to normal after stretching it to its limits, so to speak.

Frankly, my dear…

I couldn’t care less. I’m certainly not inspired by his “diet” to try it on myself. Why? Because I know three things:

1) These celebrities are paid very well for their time and efforts in taking their bodies to the limits to fulfill the needs of their roles. It’s one thing to select a celebrity for either their star power (the name they’ve built) or their talent regardless of how they look nothing like the character… but to select them and expect them to go that extra distance? Someone is paying serious dough for it. I can’t knock the hustle if 50 Cent felt like the dough was worth the strain on his body that a liquid diet may leave him with – actually, I could, but like my usual statement goes… I’m neither invested in nor affected by his personal decisions.

2) They are monitoring his every-freaking-move while on this thing. Think about it – a full liquid diet and only cardio is meant to deflate the body – it’s supposed to make him look like a cancer patient! A lifestyle meant to emaciate the body that thoroughly, coupled with that money in point one? Means he’s got the best doctors monitoring his every move. And rightfully so. Liquid diets are no joke. He’s being monitored so closely because he needed extreme measures for a temporary effect. As he said, “I’ve been eating – I’ll be back in shape in no time!” He’s basically telling you… that mess was only temporary. And as anyone who reads this site often would know, I’m gonna tell you – healthy, sustainable weight loss is absolutely about a lifestyle change. Not a temporary diet.

3) Look at him. He looks like his role. They nailed it! The body I want is brickhouse-style, and I know how to get it. That certainly doesn’t include looking like I’m battling cancer. Any brickhouse you know that resembles 50 Cent in these photos, well… you’re lying about her being a brickhouse. Ya just are.

In short… unless you’re being paid millions of dollars to go out of your way to change the way your body responds to food and, well, life… I suggest you skip that idea and just look forward to seeing 50 putting this new body to use.